How to make yourself sick?? Have you ever thought of being sick for a whole week and so? Or changing my question into this, have you ever tried to pretend to be sick realistically? I don’t know about you guys but I have done this in person a couple of times and I am not ashamed of admitting it. It is perfectly normal too, take a day off from work or not in a mood to go to school and actually want others to believe that you are damn sick.
Some common symptoms of sickness are sneezing, coughing, sweating, and headache, ah missing most important one fever. Just relax I am going to give you tips on how to get sick without risking your own life. Is it even possible? Let’s find out:
Think twice and be certain about what you are doing! This can go wrong as well, excess of everything is BAD. Anybody or I won’t be liable for any damage done. So be certain of what you do!
1- How to Catch Fever and Cough in Six quick Ways
How to make yourself sick with a fever?? There are six quick ways:
- Take a cold shower, and sit in front of AC with minimum clothes on your body, or even sitting on a terrace in cold will also help. I know it seems silly and funny but sitting naked will boost up the process.
- Drink ice-cold water multiple times a day.
- Try not to sleep for as much time as possible and try to wear minimum clothes as you can.
- Elbow grease yourself by doing exercise beyond your capacity
- Don’t eat anything, go to intensive fasting mode.
- Wish to God that you get a fever (not a lethal one). Because he rarely gets this kind of wish, and I am sure he will show his mercy.
2- Strange Cough
This one is really funny I call this “Corona strategy”, just go to your Boss and cough in front of him violently, he will personally request you to take a leave of 14 days as the corona pandemic is still on our heads. This advice can also be used to get rid of your spouse for a limited time. If you are a smoker then congratulations to you, smoking is going to help you for the first time in your life, what you have to do is simply double your cigarettes. This will make you cough naturally, you won’t need to pretend an artificial one. Just saying, smoking is an injury to your health stay aware and one piece of advice to my audience please think of your loved ones while you smoke.
How to make yourself sick to stay home from school? To my little audience, who haven’t done school homework or don’t want to see the face of a boring teacher, I haven’t forgotten you. I would advise you to drink as many cold beverages as you can especially after excising, why? In simple biological terms (not going in-depth), your body is really warmed up by drinking cold beverages will definably make you cough. If you are a good actor then go for it, trust your own guts rather than hiding behind excuses.
3- Loss of Appetite; Ditching Food
This symptom can play a good role in putting a blindfold on the subjected party. This must go along with all other symptoms to fake your illness successfully. Try to make a scene in front of the subjected party (who you want to convince) by refusing to eat anything they try to offer you. If you can’t control your hunger just remember this quote by Rick Riordan “True success requires sacrifice”. Your main aim is just to show others you have a lack of interest in food, which will eventually fill the missing ingredient.
4- Mimicking Headache
I would say this is the easiest way to let people believe you are sick because there is no tool yet developed to verify it. Considering the fact that it is trouble-free to fake a headache you don’t even need to actually seed a headache and truthfully we don’t even know how to make it happen. So faking a headache you need to add a little drama of hypersensitivity from light and many other external factors. Try to speak out of pain and go to sleep before time, but before that let the subjected party believe you won’t be able to attend school or office tomorrow.
5- Bring a Frog in your Throat; Hoarseness
This one is really easy if you are thinking about how to make yourself sick overnight?
Then you don’t need to stress out to get your voice hoarseness. The best way which I like the most is by going to my favorite club where I sing out loud so the next day I will have a hoarseness voice. To my little audience, try to yell a lot may be cheering for your favorite sports team or sing in high key, this will help to put pressure on your vocal cords and would help them vibrate at a higher pitch which will automatically irritate your vocal folds, hence leaving your voice raspy.
These tips to make yourself sick which I have given you can help you take off from your office as well as from school but don’t go too far on this. It can make you even sick for more than one or two days. I know we all get tired of the same routine and get bored but it doesn’t mean to play with your health. We all need rest so that our brains could function properly but playing a dangerous game can make it even worse. I am again insisting, think twice before doing this because no one will be available to help you if your health gets worse. Always be aware of the consequences. Stay safe and stay healthy.